Gruesome deaths that’s what!

Faced with the final conflict, the heroes of Final Fantasy fight the final battle against their final foes. Finally…

Check out the dude with the flamethrower! mmm pyro

Not that I really can play tennis…

I still need to do my exercise so I might flail around with my wii controller and see if my virtual tennins skills and and better than my real life tennis (lack of) skils. Keep you eyes posted for a review soon.

Metal Gear Solid 4 was released last week to universal acclaim. Solid Snake’s final mission was a success. Benny & Rafi Fine of RavenStake.com took this into account and present a new episode in the wildly popular Kung-Fu Grip entitled “Metal Gear Solid: Snake’s Final Days” on The Escapist.

Snake has cancer and thus begins his final mission. From killing The Simpsons family as an act of retribution to trying to end his problems with a grenade, Snake lives through hell in his final days as the cancer spreads. Snake’s final mission may not be glamorous, but it is funny as hell.

Check it out:

What do you get when you mix the unknown, the most visited urban park in the United States, and near perfect shooting accuracy? Aside from one hell of a movie, you get the latest Alone in The Dark teaser trailer by Atari Interactive and Eden Games.

Is Central Park really for the people?

The latest teaser asks this question which is the very basis of Alone in The Dark. After many strange occurrences at the park, from mutated trees to unusual bird and insect behavior, Edward Carnby returns to battle the mysterious, the paranormal, and the unknown. All in order to find out just what the hell is wrong with Central Park, the park worth $528,783,552,000 dollars.

Awesome.

Hey, guys! Today, June 11th, is Sarcastic Gamer’s first birthday. To commemorate this, Jeromy “Doc” Adams (How You Killed Your Brand, Ring of Fire, Hey Mr. Thompson) has released a new parody music video based on Nintendo’s latest innovative peripheral, Wii Fit. The “Wii Fat Song” is a parody of The Counting Crows’ 2002 hit, Big Yellow Taxi, and tells the story of one fat man’s struggle with Nintendo’s Wii Fit, as he tries his hardest to lose weight.

“This song is dedicated to everyone who will try anything, including this, to get healthy,” said Adam.

For those wanting the MP3 of this song, the standalone MP3 of the “Wii Fat Song” will be released to Sarcastic Gamer’s Humpday Update podcast subscribers on Wednesday.

Here’s the video:

Isopod Labs, a Santa Monica based developer, is currently working on V8 Arcade, a remake of the late 1990’s vehicular combat series, Vigilante 8 (…and it’s sequel, Vigilante 8 Second Offense.) created by Activision in part with Luxoflux. It is set for a Spring 2008 release.

V8 Arcade has been built from the ground up by “the original founders of Luxoflux and V8 developers.” In addition to multiplayer over Xbox Live, V8 Arcade will also feature local split-screen mode and five new areas based on the original Vigilante 8 levels.

According to Valve, they are “almost” finishing up an upgrade to everyone’s favorite purse welding pyromanic, Pyro. After the wildly successful Medic achievement pack release, Valve started work on fixing up the Team Fortress 2 class that had the shortest life expectancy right next to the Scout.

The new update to Team Fortress 2 will include Meet the Sniper, the next video in the Meet The Class… series, new Pyro class based achievements, and new items for the Pyro, such as the Axtinguisher (still in concept form), which is just like the normal Axe weapon, except hitting someone that’s on fire with the Axtinguisher will guarantee a critical hit. The new update will also fix some of the mechanical problems with the Pyro, which are long overdue.

Based on Valve Time, it will be released in a few months.